Monday, January 19, 2015

Tips For Minimizing The Pain And Expense Of Divorce

Divorce is typically known as an expensive and heart-wrenching proposition but it does not have to be as devastating as it often becomes. It is rare that divorce is mutually perceived as best for everyone involved, however, the few divorces that fit that description are usually the quick and inexpensive divorces clients desire. Alternatively, when children are involved, there are substantial assets at stake or where only one party wishes to terminate the relationship emotions run high in a divorce and when emotions rise the duration, cost and pain of divorce rises accordingly.

If only one party wishes to terminate the relationship, the other party is often hurt as they are facing the prospect of raising children, supporting a household and simply living on their own leaving them without a sense of security they have enjoyed throughout the marriage. They are also facing the stigma of divorce among their friends and family plus they may have strong religious beliefs contrary to divorce.

The party wishing to move on should do so with dignity and make a great effort to avoid any unnecessary emotional distress to the other party. Spending time publicly or in the presence of the children with a paramour, especially if there was an affair while the marriage was intact, is one of the best ways to ensure the other party seeks revenge in a divorce. The party who does not wish to divorce will be best served to rise above their instincts to seek revenge through financial devastation of the other party or endeavoring to prevent the other party from seeing the children.

When it comes to custody and parenting time, it is difficult for both parties and the children to face the prospect of no longer seeing each other on a full-time basis. However, if the parties work together for the best interests of the children and each other, they can often arrive at a parenting time schedule which is healthy for all involved. For example, if the parties work schedules include different days of the week, it would be most sensible for the parties to spend time with the children on their respective days off. Also, if one party remains in the school district where the family resided while intact, it is sensible for the party remaining in that school district to have the weekday overnight parenting time in order to make it easiest for the children to get to school as well as maintain existing friendships during this difficult time.

One frequent claim used to win favor in custody and parenting time battles is the unfitness of the other parent. Often parties will obtain experts to undertake evaluations of the other parent, at great expense, in an effort to prevent the other party from seeing the children. Divorcing parties should realize that the courts will always endeavor to continue and foster the relationship between the children and both parents. Unless one party was truly absent, abusive or otherwise dangerous to the children it is highly unlikely that one party will obtain sole custody and prevent the other party from enjoying liberal parenting time.

Finally, there are the matters of equitable distribution, or asset division, and alimony. Both parties should consult experienced family law attorneys, whether jointly or individually, to obtain a realistic view of how their assets will likely be divided by the court. An experienced divorce lawyer will be able to explain to you how assets will likely be divided and alimony will be established. A family law attorney should be able to help you construct a plan to divide assets in a way that will enable both parties to move forward with the least amount of financial devastation possible. This is not to say that it will be easy for either party going forward from a financial standpoint but it may be less difficult.

You may find yourself ahead of the game if you hire a lawyer who explains to you the expense of divorce and the fact that the more either or both parties fight for assets, alimony and custody or parenting time, the greater the expense of the divorce and the fewer assets both parties will have to move on with their lives after the divorce is over.

If you are considering divorce or merely seeking additional information regarding divorce, child custody, parenting time, equitable distribution or other family law matters visit
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